Oh the Summertime.
Yea, I’m out of school.
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I’d love to flaunt this all over facebook and stuff but I don’t want to make other people who aren’t done yet feel bad about themselves.
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Ok, I lied. The only reason I didn’t post a facebook status is because I couldn’t think of anything particularly clever and non-cliche. You know, like:
“Summertime and the living’s easy.”
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Not that there’s anything wrong with putting that as your status, I just have this weird thing about being different.
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Anyways, I’m now on summer which means I have nothing to do!
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And thus, here I am.
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So here’s a few goals for the summer. If it seems like I’m not working on them, keep me accountable!
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1. Get a job… or two
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I need money and work experience. I’ve applied to a few places but have so far heard nothing. Panera looks pretty promising, they’re opening two new stores in my area.
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Their application is online though, and I hate that. They include those 45 minute personality tests that I think are entirely misleading. Questions like “Workers should question authority” (do you strongly disagree, disagree, neutral, agree, or strongly agree?)
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On one hand, if my manager tells me to go bake some bread in the oven (this hypothetical situation is based in Panera) I’m not gonna be like “Bake your own loaf, doofus.”
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On the other hand, if my manager tells me to go bake some babies in the oven, I’m not gonna be like “Ok. For how long?”
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Also, I think it takes the personal aspect out of the job application process. If you ask me, it’s like trying to date online. You don’t really get a sense of who someone is until you actually spend time with them. Online dating… thank goodness our society will never stoop that low.
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…wait…
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Anyways, I’ll keep applying pretty much everywhere I can. Let me know if you know anywhere in the fullerton area that’s hiring! I really need a job. If I don’t get one, I’ll have to find something else to do with my time.
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like…
…blog. *shudders*
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Thank goodness I’d never stoop so low as to start a blog because I couldn’t get a job.
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…wait…
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2. Dunk.
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Not Oreos, Nilla Wafers, or kangaroo shaped confections, we’re talking basketballs here folks.
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Planning on training all summer to increase my vertical so I can throw down like Lebron.
The way I see it, there are plenty of people who are ballers, have killer crossovers and jumpshots, etc. If you can dunk though, you don’t even have to be good. You’re just cool. (Just like Josh Smith).
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3. Create the double down get ripped for summer workout plan (name pending)
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So I saw the commercials for the new KFC double down sandwich (two chicken breasts, bacon, cheese) and while everyone was busy being nauseated/vomiting at the sight of the behemoth, I thought “whoa, I bet you could get super huge eating those every day.”
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So I think I’ll try eating one of these bad boys every day and working out (they weigh in at about 60 grams of protein and 550 calories) and see what happens. I might just get super buff and then ladies will love me even more.
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Or I could just become really fat.
That would hurt my chances of accomplishing goal #2.
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And possibly #1.
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Oh wait, everyone’s doing online applications. Nevermind.
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4. Spend quality time with people
Summer should be a time to reconnect with people and hang out all day, right?
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I won’t lie to you, last summer (at least for the first month) I had nothing to do because no one else was out of school.
I spent pretty much all of May going to bed at 5am watching Angel re-runs on TNT and sleeping in until 5pm.
Not only was this boring, but a complete waste of time I could have spent with people.
…Man, it’s a good thing I didn’t have this thing a year ago. I’d probably be at like… 500 entries.
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uh… those of you who just got excited about the idea of me writing 500 entries…
You should also probably be looking to spend some time with people.
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Just saying.
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So i’ve got some cool things planned for this summer to prevent last year’s disaster from happening like Alpha, camp counseling, roadtrip to Canada with the buddies, and a summer basketball league but I still won’t be seeing everyone I want to see.
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So if we haven’t hung out in a while, I’d love to touch base with you!
We can do cool summer things like…make lemonade… and ride bikes… and be visited by the Coors Light Silver Bullet?
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…those commercials are so ridiculous.
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You’re telling me if I cover a wall with black paint it starts snowing and everyone gets free beer?
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5. This one is probably the most important:
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I’m twenty years old.
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let’s be frank:
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I need a girlfriend.
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It’s time to get the ball rolling! My biological clock is ticking, I gotta get a move on. It won’t be long before I’m old, gray, fat, single, and drowning my sorrows with lonely Friday nights spent watching MANswers.
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So hopefully summer ‘10 will be a summer of love for me cuz I’ll be on the prowl.
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Bazinga. You’ve fallen victim to one my classic pranks.
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(Come on now, really?)
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Here’s to a great summer.
Hope I’ll be seeing you around.
