[no subject]
Greetings.
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It’s 3:40 a.m and I’ve been trying to sleep since 1:30. I have apparently failed miserably at the one thing I was sure I’m pretty darn good at.
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Don’t worry, this isn’t going to be one of those posts where I’m frustrated about life and it’s the middle of the night and I write something slightly ambiguous but you can pretty much tell its about my love life or my father or how angry I am about not feeling like I have a purpose in life- Immediately followed by a hasty delete the next morning.
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I like to think a lot, and sometimes that keeps me awake.
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At the same time, that’s also what keeps my ever-so-charming blog alive. (Although in recent months it’s been in more of a vegetative state)
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^sidenote- It took me about 10 tries to spell vegetable/vegetative. Harder than you might think, really.
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I think about a lot of things.
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Some of it is normal, like what I have to do tomorrow, or something funny that happened to me that day.
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Most of it is pretty weird: like if my dog Muffin’s mouth tastes as bad as it smells (Not in an overly-curious, make out with my dog just to find out kind of way) and if he minds, or what I’d look like if I were another ethnicity, or what my wife will be like and if she’ll freak out because I do weird things in my sleep like fart excessively or something.
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I also love to think about the people in my life, because I know so many interesting ones. Sometimes I think about people I just spoke to today, sometimes it’s people I haven’t seen for 15 years. I try to imagine what they look like now and think it’d be cool if one day they Googled my name (there’s only one of me), found my blog, and found out that I think about them too. Mr. Birch’s 3rd grade class, holla at cho boi.
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Hey, remember that thing I said about thinking about 3rd graders late at night, hoping they’re thinking about me too?
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…yea, I don’t remember either.
I’m glad neither of us remember and will ever talk about it ever again because that was definitely something allegedly written out of delirium.
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I got up because I think I realized I was hungry. Unfortunately I’m a really poor college student and all I had at my apartment were generic brand wheat thins.
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I remembered I had some 2 month old frozen waffles that I had never eaten because I don’t have a toaster at my apartment.
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So I figured I’d try microwaving one just to see if it’d be edible.
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I’m here to report that they were better than edible, they were delicious. Scrumptious, in fact. Don’t believe me? Try it. You have nothing to lose and the world to gain, really.
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^sidenote- I won’t even tell you how long it took me to figure out scrumptious.
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They only take about a minute in the microwave, much faster than a toaster, and they really don’t taste any different than if you had toasted them. In fact, they even get a little bit crispy. How this works, I have no idea. The intricacies of frozen breakfast foods are beyond me.
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I ate six. And I feel awesome, and ready for bed.
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Cheers.
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P.S
This post will probably be deleted soon, as that third graders sequence will probably threaten my chances at securing a full-time job.